原作者：
来源9 Stupid Myths About Bisexuals That Will Make You Laugh
译者郑君怡
January 27, 2011 |
2011年1月27日
You’ve probably heard a lot of stereotypes/jokes about bisexuality, the bastard stepchild of sexual orientations. Most people can’t even agree on a definition of bisexuality, which has led to a lot of confusion, angst and reality shows starring Tila Tequila.
你可能听过不少两性之间的笑话，继子女的性取向之类的。大多数人还是不能接受双性恋，这带来了很多困惑，忧虑在事实上就表现为人们对网络红人Tila Tequila的愤怒。
Ironically, part of the reason bisexuality gets a bad rap and why so few people openly identify as such, is because it’s associated with many negative cultural connotations. For our purposes, I’ll define a bisexual as someone who is drawn to emotional and/or sexual relationships with different genders, although terms relating to bisexuality run the gamut and can include descriptors such as "pansexual," "queer," "ambisexual," "omni-sexual," and “Larry King.”
具有讽刺意味的是，双性恋不能被人们接受的部分原因，是因为他和许多不良文化有着隐藏的联系。为了达到我们的目的，我要把双性恋定义为一个人对不同的两种性别都有“性趣”，一般对双性恋的定义都用“色域”这个词，还和“泛性论”，“怪人同性恋”，“两性人”挂钩。
In this article, I aim to dispel the biggest bisexual misconceptions and stereotypes, shed light on some new ones, and help to document a sexual identity that is often shrugged off as a "phase," a "gateway," "homosexuality lite" or "college."
在这篇文章里，我要消除大家对双性恋最大的误解和错误印象，告诉你们一些新的观念，让你们觉得双性恋和一个“周期”，一扇“大门”，“性冷淡”或者“大学”一样正常。
1. Bisexuals are sluts. Okay, I’ll be the first to admit that I would probably f*ck a jar of Nutella if it looked at me the right way, but just because bisexuals technically have more options for sexual partners doesn’t mean they are more promiscuous. As a friend wrote to me in an email recently, “I'm glad I'm not bisexual because then I'd be rejected by men and women.” Naturally, there are bisexuals who are non-monogamous, and who want to sow their oats into as many Quakers as possible, but the same could be said for every sexual orientation. Perhaps the truer statement is we all have the potential to be slutty, regardless of which way we swing.
1、双性恋者是一群荡妇。好吧，我会是第一个承 认如果一个花生酱棒棒在路上看着我我就会强奸它的人，但是这并不意味着双性恋者因为拥有更多性伴侣的选择他们就会更加淫乱。最近有个朋友发了封邮件给我， 上面说：“我很庆幸我不是双性恋者，因为这样我就会被男人和女人同时拒绝。”自然地，有些双性恋没有实行一夫一妻制，他们还想尽可能跟多的人性交，但是每 种性取向的人都可能会这样呀。也许更为正确的说法是我们都变得淫荡的潜质，不管我们是不是双性恋。
2. Bisexual women only do it to turn straight guys on. We call these ladies beersexuals, and yes, they do exist, but not usually outside of college campuses or David Schwimmer parties. There are also, of course, the Madonna/Britney Spears make-outs of the world, though that was more of a straight-up gay-for-pay publicity stunt than to give America a collective stiffy. Katy Perry pulled the same stunt with her “I Kissed A Girl” song, which is so tepid it’s downright laughable. Lyrics paraphrased: “I kissed a girl, but I was drunk! And I have a boyfriend! And it’s human nature, but I’m still really rebellious!” Pair that with her song against feminine men, “UR So Gay” and you’ve got a recipe for an Out magazine award waiting to happen. (I’m not kidding. She was “Person of the Year” in 2009.) Barring celebrity bisexuals and Girls Gone Wild girls though, I can assure you that most bisexual chicks are highly annoyed by leering dudes who catcall, whistle, or are generally all up in their biznass when they are courting another lady.
2、 双性恋的女人只在喝醉的时候才对女人有“性趣”。我们把这种女人成为“酒后同性恋”，是的，她们确实存在，但并不是一般在大学校园外面或者“大卫劳伦斯” 式派对里面。当然啦，世界上也有像麦当娜或者小甜甜布兰妮式的性交方式，尽管与其说这像给美国一个炒作的噱头还不如说这更像赤裸公开的有偿同性恋技巧的交 易。Katy Perry的歌“I kissed a Girl”就是相同的炒作，她是如此的不温不火，看起来就像彻头彻尾的笑话。歌词写道：“我亲吻了一个女孩，但是我喝醉啦！我有男朋友了！这是人类本性， 但是我实在够叛逆！”把她的歌和娘娘的男人放在一起，就好比“你真像个男同志”和你就要得到Out杂志的奖了相提并论。（我没有在开玩笑。她可真的是 2009年的年度人物啊。）除了双性恋明星和那些放荡的女孩子，我敢保证大多数双性恋的女孩子会被吹口哨的乱送秋波的花花公子惹恼，如果他们劈腿女孩们更 加会愤怒不已。
3. Bisexuals are indecisive or confused. A gay man I met at a bar once told me that bisexuals “just can’t make up their minds.” And I replied, “I don’t have a problem making up my mind. For instance, I think you’re an asshole.” Derogatory statements like the above are all too common to a bisexual’s ears. And yes, it comes from both the gay and straight communities, which sometimes think bisexuals are either cowardly or are taking advantage of straight privilege. However, being attracted to more than one gender is about as likely to make you “indecisive” as watching a lot of musical theater is likely to turn you gay. Also, isn’t it odd that it’s always the gays and straights who are confused about bisexuality, and not bisexuals themselves?
3、 双性恋者通常优柔寡断或者充满迷茫。我在酒吧遇见的一个男同志有次跟我说双性恋者“常常不能作出决定。”而我回答说，“我在做决定上就不会进退两难。举个 例子吧，我觉得你就是个二逼。”像这种贬义的评论对双性恋来说实在是听得耳朵起茧子了。没错，不管是同志还是正常人群，都觉得双性恋者又像懦夫又利用他们 直接的特权。然而，被两种性别的人吸引就像你难以决定去看哪场音乐剧有可能把你变成同性恋一样。还有，一般来说不是同性恋会比较犹豫自己要不要喜欢这个双 性恋，而不是双性恋在犹豫吗？
4. Bisexuality is a cop-out or a phase. It’s always scary to come out of the closet for the first time, despite what you may have seen on Bravo, but coming out as bisexual is essentially declaring that you don’t have a preference. It’s a revolving closet, so it’s somewhat understandable that people tend to view bisexuality as a stepping stone to a more “valid” or “realized” sexual identity. And sometimes this is indeed the case. Elton John comes to mind. But this rationale is just another way people try to devalue bisexuality as an identity, the same tactic used to devalue homosexuality, or being transgender, etc. A lot of thought, turmoil and struggle goes into the decision to come out, and to dismiss it so readily is deliberately insulting.
4、双性恋是一个站不住脚的借口，或者是人的 某个阶段。第一次听见这个词总是相当可怕，尽管你可能在Bravo上看见过，但是双性恋往往意味着你是没有个人偏好的。这是一个周期的一部分，因此人们常 常把双性恋看做通往更加“生动”更加“明确”的性认知的一步。有时候也确实是这种情况。我想起了Elton John。但是这种解释是人们把双性恋贬为一种个性的行为，也是人们贬低同性恋者和变性人等的同一种战术。很多的想法，许多的思想斗争在此形成，拒绝这些 想法就像故意侮辱他们。
5. Everybody is bisexual. Not even close. This misconception started with Freud, was bolstered by Kinsey, and now seems to be spread predominantly through Yahoo! forums. However, there are a lot more people acting on bisexual desires than there are who identify as such. We call these people “Republican senators.” While not everyone is bisexual, here’s a small smattering of bi celebs who are commonly mistaken or purposefully misconstrued as card-carrying homos and heteros: Sappho (yes, the Greek poster-dyke), Kurt Cobain, James Dean, Ani DiFranco, Walt Whitman, Anais Nin, Frida Kahlo, Eleanor Roosevelt, Alexander the Great, Tchaikovsky, Michael Stipe, Lord Byron, Emily Dickinson, Andy Dick, Herman Melville, Eve Ensler, Judy Garland, Georgia O’Keeffe (who was Frida’s lover for a time), Marlon Brando, Cary Grant, Billie Holiday, Angelina Jolie, Janis Joplin, David Bowie, Jack Kerouac, Kristanna Loken (from Terminator 3 and the one who burned Shane’s house down in Season 4 of The L Word), Madonna, Elton John, Amanda Palmer (from the Dresden Dolls), Cole Porter, Anthony Rapp (Rent), Virginia Woolf, Patti Smith, Mick Jagger and on and on. (To see a more complete list of bi celebs, check out the Wikipedia page.)
5、 每个人都是双性恋。这和事实相差甚远。这种错误的概念始于弗洛伊德，而被Kinsey进一步发展。现在似乎主要通过雅虎论坛传播。还有的人本身不是双性 恋，却表现出一副双性恋的样子。我们把这些人称为“共和党参议员”。尽管并非每个人都是双性恋，但是有相当数量的名人被误认为是男同志或女同志：萨福（没 错，这个希腊的女同志），库尔特.科班，詹姆斯.迪恩，安妮.迪福兰蔻，沃尔特.惠特曼，……，乔治亚.O‘keeffee（弗里达的初恋，）……克里斯 蒂娜.罗根（终结者三里面的演员她在L Word第4季里面烧了Shane的房子），阿曼达帕尔默（来自德累斯顿玩偶）……等等。（如果你想看到更加详细的清单可以查阅维基百科）
6. Nobody is bisexual. As one of my bisexual male friends said recently, “When people say bisexual men don't exist, it cracks me up. Would you like to hook me up to some wires and machines and have me watch both gay and straight porn to see that both will increase my heart rate and give me a hard-on?” When I told him that study had actually been done, which supposedly proved that bisexual men were just “liars,” he quipped, “I've done that study on my own a few times. I liked the results.” The study, but perhaps more significantly the New York Times article where it was showcased, claimed, “You’re either straight, gay or lying.” The study based its conclusions on whether self-described bisexual men responded physically to visual sexual stimuli, i.e. porn. The problem with the study (one of many problems documented by the National Gay and Lesbian Taskforce, among others) is that it bases sexual orientation on arousal alone. On the flip side, also curiously in a New York Times article, straight women were found to be physically aroused by everything from masturbation to naked ladies to couples doing it, even to bonobo chimps getting it on. What didn’t turn these women on, you ask? Pictures of naked men. Yet, no one seemed to call these women lying rug munchers in denial, did they?
6、世界上没有双性恋者。就像我最近一个双性 恋的男性朋友所说的那样，“当人们说世界上没有双性恋者的时候，都快把我弄崩溃了。难道非要在我身上缠满电线，连在机器上然后给我看同志的图片和正常人亲 密的图片，发现我对这两者都有反应才行吗？”当我告诉他正在进行的研究很可能会证明双性恋者只不过在撒谎，他讽刺地说，“我在自己身上也做了些研究，我喜 欢自己的结论。”这项研究，也许比纽约时报上发表的那篇文章上说的更加重要，那篇文章宣称，“你要么是异性恋，要么是同性恋，要么就是在撒谎。”他和篇文 章的结论是基于自认为是双性恋的男人对色情的生理反应。这项研究的问题在于（这是the National Gay and Lesbian taskforce发表的文献提出的问题之一）他把性取向等同于性冲动。在另一方面，同样有趣的是纽约时报的另一篇文章里，女人的性冲动会被从手淫到裸体 女人到男女的云雨之事唤起，甚至倭黑猩猩也可以。你问有什么不能让女人性冲动？裸体男人的照片。没有人要那些女人躺在满是刺的毯子上逼迫她们拒绝，对吧？
7. Bisexuals can never be happy in a monogamous relationship. Let the record show that bisexuals are just as likely to fail at monogamy as the rest of you infidels! According to Peggy Vaughan, author of The Monogamy Myth, statistics show that 40 percent of women and 60 percent of men have affairs at least once in their marriages. Since these people aren’t always married to each other, that means about 80 percent of all marriages are “touched” by adultery. But being bisexual doesn’t make you any more likely to cheat than being straight or gay does. Nor does it mean that bisexuals are destined to be miserable without a variety of genitalia at their disposal. Just as in other sexual relationships, being partnered with one person doesn’t suddenly negate your attraction to other people. The same goes for bisexuals in monogamous relationships.
7、双性恋在一夫一妻制的情况下不会幸福的。让记录的事实告诉你们双性恋在一夫一妻的失 败可能和你们这些异教徒一样！据Peggy Vaughan所说，他是《一夫一妻制的秘密》的作者，书上的数据显示40%的女人和60%的男人在他们的婚姻生活里起码有一次出轨。这些人并不总是一对 夫妻，那就意味着大约80%的夫妇都和“通奸”有着这样那样的关系。但是双性恋并非比同性恋者和异性恋者更加有可能出去偷腥。也不意味着双性恋者不能让他 们的生殖器体会到多种多样的快感他们就会很杯具。就像其他的性关系一样，和一个人成为伴侣并不说明你对其他人就没有吸引力了。这在双性恋的一夫一妻制关系 中也是一样的。
8. Bisexuals love threesomes! This is one that’s both really irritating and understandable at the same time. Sure, who doesn’t want to have their cake and eat their pussy too from time to time? But the culturally pervasive hetero dude fantasy of the threesome-as-Holy-Grail has turned a delightful, occasional sexytime experience into an annoying bombardment of cold-call propositions, usually from strangers or drunks. There was a time last year when every week, I would get a threesome proposition online from (often) the dude-half of a straight couple asking if I would like to bone them. Rarely did these propositions even contain a perfunctory “Hello, you look nice in pinstripes” or any other kind of humanizing email chatter. Instead, bisexuals are thought of as the Jiffy Lubes of sexual experience, always ready and available to help you with your fluids at the drop of an un-proofread email. To be fair, one guy didn’t just ask me and my then-girlfriend for a threeway; he asked us to bear his children and then also offered to pay us $10 to do data entry. Also, while swinging and orgy parties do seem to be on the rise (there are roughly 3,000 clubs worldwide) preference for group sex will always be in the minority. Remember that the next time you try to slur your way into a bisexual’s pants at dollar draught night.
8、双性恋喜欢 三P！这种想法既烦人又可以理解。当然啦，谁不想鱼和熊掌兼得呢？但是文化上无孔不入的那些异类花花公子关于三P的幻想，把一个开心的随性的性经历变成了 骚扰电话的可怕轰击，一般是醉鬼或者陌生人打来的。去年有段时间，每个星期，都会接到在线的三P邀请的轰炸，一般都是一对男女问我是否愿意加入他们。这种 骚扰都不能用草率来形容，“你好呀，你穿西装的样子好帅哟。”或者任何其他的人性化电邮聊天内容都没有。与之相反的是，双性恋者被认为是这种性经历的“瞬 间润滑剂”，他们总是时刻准备着，时刻都有时间来充当你的润滑剂，马上回复你那没打草稿的邮件。公平地说，一个同性恋者不仅仅是要跟我和我的女朋友搞三 P，他还要求我们忍受他的孩子，在完事之后还会付给我们10美元。还有，尽管摇摆狂欢派对的数量在不断上升（世界上大概有3000个俱乐部）喜欢群交的毕 竟还是少数。下次你要找双性恋的时候记得带钱哟。
9. Bisexuals love puns. This one is true. Whoever said “puns are the lowest form of humor” was probably not getting laid regularly. Puns are a form of wordplay that exists in all languages. They’re cheeky, exploit the multiple meanings of words, and are the verbal equivalent of a double take. Come again, you ask? Many bisexuals love to pun because they operate on the assumption that nothing has a fixed meaning, much like sexual identity. Take the term "hasbien" for example. This is used as a mildly derisive name for lesbians who have gone back to dating men. Instead of viewing hasbiens as traitors, or policing others for the sake of political correctness, punsters decided not to go bi the book and instead created a humorous renaming of bisexuality in the word hasbien.
9、双性恋者喜欢双关 语。这次你答对啦。那些说“双关语是最低级的幽默”的人可能没有规律的性生活。双关语是所有语言里都存在的一种文字游戏。他们可是非常厚颜无耻的开发着词 汇的各种意思，而动词往往事半功倍。你又问什么？很多双性恋喜欢说双关语因为他们认为什么什么的意义的固定不变的，就像人们对性的定义。就拿 “hasbien”这个术语来说吧。这是指一个女人以前是同性恋后来又重新和男人约会。双性恋者没有把“hasbien”视为叛徒，或者给她们上纲上线， 而是创造了这么一个有趣的名字来诠释hasbien在性取向上的变化。
Another reason bisexuals like puns is because the word bi is infinitely pun-able. Take a quick look at these bi publications: Seattle Women’s Bisexual Network newsletter, “North Bi Northwest”; “BiAngles,” a bisexual zine; “BiCEP,” the Bisexual Committee Engaging in Politics; “LeBiDo,” and my favorite, the Queer Nation Bi Caucus, “UBIQUITOUS” (Uppity Bi Queers United in Their Overtly Unconventional Sexuality).
双性恋者喜欢双关语的另外一个原 因是“bi”（双性恋者英语单词的前两个字母）这个单词可以说无限个双关语。浏览一下这些“bi”的双关语吧：西雅图双性恋女性的互联网通讯报纸 “North Bi Northwest”;双性恋的电子杂志“BiAngles”；双性恋者政治上的委员会“BiCEP”；还有"LeBiDo"，还有我最喜欢的，the Queer Nation Bi Caucus,“UBIQUITOUS”（Uppity Bi Queers United in Their Overtly Unconventional Sexuality的缩写） |
